So, May Term has been over for about two days now. I'm still tired, still waking up early and staying at Josh's (as the last entry implies).
Mom asked my Saturday afternoon if I was depressed yet and at the time I was just tired. But now that reality is slowly setting in, I don't really know. I have had some really good times here, and other times have really sucked. But I have made really good friends and I don't want to lose contact with them.
Am I depressed? A little but not quite yet. Will I be? Most likely, especially on the way home. But I can call all these people and talk to them, and over the summer and next year there's always facebook and IM and whatnot. I'm looking forward to the future, even though I am a litte... apprehensive? scared? hesitant?
Alright, my word nerd is showing. I'm out.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
I actually feel like a college student...
So the good news is that after four years of college classes, today I actually felt like a college student. I think the funniest part about it is the fact that we weren't even in the classroom today.
Justin and Levi decided that today the class was going to take a field trip so we went to Wichita for lunch and a movie. The movie ended up being the new Ben Stein documentary, Expelled. For those of you who haven't seen it, you should. The documentary is about the fact that free speech is dying in our country when it comes to anything that even remotely resembling something like Christianity and science. Mainly Darwinism versus Intelligent Design (ID).
For those of you who don't know, ID is the idea that the universe and the species were created by an intelligent being (not necessarily God, just any intelligent being) and not by Darwin's idea of natural selection. As it turns out, there are scientists, professors, teachers, respected, highly intelligent people in this world who are being fired, expelled and blackballed because they have mentioned something in papers or speeches about ID. Why? Because other, stupid people who don't know what they are talking about believe that ID refers to the Christian idea of creationism, which it doesn't.
I think my favorite part of the documentary came when Ben was interviewing a fairly well-known scientist, self proclaimed atheist, and author of "The God Delusion," Richard Dawkins. The reason this is my favorite part is because after pretty intense questioning about the origin of life, and where that first particle comes from, Dawkins says something about an alien or some other intelligent being coming down and planting it there. Um... Hello? Do you realize what you just said? I think he does because immediately after that, all he can really answer is "I don't know." "I don't know." "I don't know." Personally if I had read his book, and if I had believed him, I would no longer have any respect for him. In front of millions of people, he not only contradicted himself, but now he can't even back pedal out of it, so all he can say is "I don't know."
It seems that the general populous wants to exclude anything that could even remotely be connected to Christianity from everything, science, society, everything. Even though I support a relative separation of such things, I don't think you can completely discount Christianity from things. It is in fact a part of our society and life whether we believe it or not and trying to eliminate it will eliminate a large part of what makes our society what it is. Take that as you will.
Justin and Levi decided that today the class was going to take a field trip so we went to Wichita for lunch and a movie. The movie ended up being the new Ben Stein documentary, Expelled. For those of you who haven't seen it, you should. The documentary is about the fact that free speech is dying in our country when it comes to anything that even remotely resembling something like Christianity and science. Mainly Darwinism versus Intelligent Design (ID).
For those of you who don't know, ID is the idea that the universe and the species were created by an intelligent being (not necessarily God, just any intelligent being) and not by Darwin's idea of natural selection. As it turns out, there are scientists, professors, teachers, respected, highly intelligent people in this world who are being fired, expelled and blackballed because they have mentioned something in papers or speeches about ID. Why? Because other, stupid people who don't know what they are talking about believe that ID refers to the Christian idea of creationism, which it doesn't.
I think my favorite part of the documentary came when Ben was interviewing a fairly well-known scientist, self proclaimed atheist, and author of "The God Delusion," Richard Dawkins. The reason this is my favorite part is because after pretty intense questioning about the origin of life, and where that first particle comes from, Dawkins says something about an alien or some other intelligent being coming down and planting it there. Um... Hello? Do you realize what you just said? I think he does because immediately after that, all he can really answer is "I don't know." "I don't know." "I don't know." Personally if I had read his book, and if I had believed him, I would no longer have any respect for him. In front of millions of people, he not only contradicted himself, but now he can't even back pedal out of it, so all he can say is "I don't know."
It seems that the general populous wants to exclude anything that could even remotely be connected to Christianity from everything, science, society, everything. Even though I support a relative separation of such things, I don't think you can completely discount Christianity from things. It is in fact a part of our society and life whether we believe it or not and trying to eliminate it will eliminate a large part of what makes our society what it is. Take that as you will.
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Carpe Diem
No, it's doesn't mean seize the carp... it means seize the day. And it's a wonderful saying to go by. Each day should be a new adventure that we should grab up and take with us.
I was watching Dead Poets Society today, and this comes up early in the movie. Todd is seen contemplating this and moments later writes the English "Seize The Day" in capital letters across the page of a notebook. He stares at it, looks at the pile of textbooks next to him and sighs, ripping the page out and crumpling it up.
I know how he felt right at that moment. I want to seize the day, I want to go out and have an adventure and do something unexpected and memorable, something that might change my life (and maybe the lives of others). The only problem is that I turn around to walk out the door and see my list of things to do, I see those textbooks piled next to me and I sigh and sit back down. I hate it! I want to do something, I want to be out there, I want to go against the tide. But I can't, I have so much crap to do for school, just so that I can attain that goal of a diploma and a future of a masters program and maybe one day even my doctorate. I've been spending every afternoon and evening sitting around doing homework, reading articles and writing papers and I don't have time for anything else.
It hurts, and it makes me sad, but there's nothing I can do to change it. I know my fellow psych majors are in the same boat, as well as a few other friends, but it doesn't make it any less bearable. My dream has turned into something that is harder than I thought it was ever going to be, but the rewards at the end will be worth it (I keep telling myself that, anyways. I can always hope).
Okay, it's late, my brain is fried, and I need sleep.
~Vix~
I was watching Dead Poets Society today, and this comes up early in the movie. Todd is seen contemplating this and moments later writes the English "Seize The Day" in capital letters across the page of a notebook. He stares at it, looks at the pile of textbooks next to him and sighs, ripping the page out and crumpling it up.
I know how he felt right at that moment. I want to seize the day, I want to go out and have an adventure and do something unexpected and memorable, something that might change my life (and maybe the lives of others). The only problem is that I turn around to walk out the door and see my list of things to do, I see those textbooks piled next to me and I sigh and sit back down. I hate it! I want to do something, I want to be out there, I want to go against the tide. But I can't, I have so much crap to do for school, just so that I can attain that goal of a diploma and a future of a masters program and maybe one day even my doctorate. I've been spending every afternoon and evening sitting around doing homework, reading articles and writing papers and I don't have time for anything else.
It hurts, and it makes me sad, but there's nothing I can do to change it. I know my fellow psych majors are in the same boat, as well as a few other friends, but it doesn't make it any less bearable. My dream has turned into something that is harder than I thought it was ever going to be, but the rewards at the end will be worth it (I keep telling myself that, anyways. I can always hope).
Okay, it's late, my brain is fried, and I need sleep.
~Vix~
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